Well this is my first post on wordpress, and not sure what to make of it as I norm use eblogger, sooo I start from the start; last tuesday I went to see my CPN and to pick up some tablets (Citalopram) from the crisis team, during this meeting as norm they were asking how I felt, I was honest with them and said I’ve been self harming, and having more thoughts on killing myself, they asked if I had any plans to do, so I told them on monday I stood on a carpark and looked down wondering how easy it be just to feel the wind in my hair and then the pain going away. The cpn who hasn’t my normal one, went to the doctor and then I got told I HAD to go to the hosp on my own choice or be detainted under the mental health act. So after many phone calls my very good friend vatta (not going to use her real name in case she doent like it being posted) came and saw me, and explained things and really just was there for me. Sooo in the end I was there for 10hrs before transport arrived for me and a other girl (she was nice and chatty, sort of a mother figcer) amd off to glouster I went.This hosp in glouster was very nice, in terms of the grounds and rooms, I had a great view of the smoking area :/ so I coundlt open the window….greatSooo during my time there I had 3 different people ask me things so I explained it all over again to them, they seemed happy I was no risk to myself at that moment of time but put me on 15min obs during the night in case I did do something app I’m some one who has self harm and trying to kill myself tenderences which they belive can be helped reduced by meds and talking about it, I got dischaged in the afternoon and was back at home by part of the letting me go, was that I HAVE to make contect with the crisis team twice a day and go to a&e if I have any thoughts or go to the crisis house, they also gave me some new tablets, so now I’m on Citalopram, Zopiclone and Diazapram, which is a good thing as the last one really calms me down to the point where I can’t act on anythingI’m really thankful for vatta on tuesday she was my rock on that day if it wasn’t for her ill be well you know… She also got me to tell my perents about it, which they took ok, asked why so I told them I’m depressed, stressed and just hell on one hell of a downer
